Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Mothering Moments.

I can already tell these posts are going to become therapeutic for me.  Maybe a bore to you...but very helpful to me as the thought of having to have something to write tonight was on my mind right at 5:40 am when the Lady woke me with a scream.  I love that.  Except I don't.  I think it rude for anyone to be awake prior to 6 am.  Just sayin.

But I got up.  And stayed in a haze all morning.  You see here is my problem & here is my break through.  You can't have it ALL.  I think that is the biggest & easiest lie society has come up with for us as women.  You can have it ALL!  You can have a career.  You can be home with your kids.  You can cook a fab dinner every night with your hair & make up done...all while always fitting into your skinny jeans!

Please tell me I am not the only one that falls into this lie repeatedly?  Please. please. please.

So I was in a haze this morning for a couple reasons -- 1. I am perpetually tired & it is mostly my own fault, but I still haven't made any changes in my behavior to have this problem go away.  2.  I have 4 graduation announcements, 2 weddings & a baby shower that I need to wrap up.  3. I also have 2 real estate listings right now {you probably didn't know I had my license did you?}. 4.  And I have these little people I am responsible for keeping alive...and hopefully enriched & learning & growing...all while they have clean faces, eat their veggies & are always obedient.

3 of the 4 things I can handle.  The real estate thing though is killing me & it has taken me way too long to admit to myself that it doesn't fit in my life right now.  You see, real estate doesn't play nice.  I once used to thrive in that environment & I was thrilled when the opportunity to get back into it came along. Because you know, I could have it all, right?  And frankly, at first it was really fun to put on my tailored pants, with my button up shirt & cardigan & have people ask my opinion. It was fun to go to fancy offices & let people think I was really important.  It was really fun to rub shoulders with my old colleagues & let them have the impression that I was 'doing it all.'  And for awhile it really felt that I was 'doing it all.'

But today it hit me like a ton of bricks.  You can have it all or you can have this:

These little people.  These little moments.  They are not glamorous.  They are not easy, but they are priceless.  They don't include fancy lunches or pressed clothes.  In fact, they don't even require you to get out of your pajamas.  And while sometimes it is easy to fall into the 'have it all' trap I need to remember all I need is right in front of me...and if I'm not careful it will slip away while I am busy pretending to do it all.

So today...I snapped myself out of my funk.  I've decided to hang up my real estate dreams for now {once I am done with these last 2}.  And enjoy these moments of silence...ha!  Silence please.  You know what silence leads to right?

 Yes.  We have a silent sneaky one on our hands {among other things}.  The Lady found an ink pad I'd left out & had herself some fun.  Look at that guilty face! A crafter in the making! hehe.

And today I decided the computer was closed for the afternoon & look what I learned...he can draw a sun, trees & grass.  A classic!  And the sillybandz are awesome, right?  Don't worry he proceed to pull these pages out of his notebook & then cut the frayed edges off -- perhaps a perfectionist in the making?!?


NattybyDesign said...

I get caught up in this all the time. I threw out making a nice dinner and having my make-up and hair done all the time.
kudos to you for simplifying.

Summers Camp said...

Loved this post, Amy. I'm so glad you're "just" a mom... Because to an outsider, it really does seem you have it all! Thanks for the wake up call. *B

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