Wednesday, August 8, 2012

First Time Kinder Mom


I've known this day was coming.  And dare I say there were many-a-times I looked forward to it?  I did.  And I feared it.  And I wished it away. And it came anyway.  3 days ago to be exact.

And it has been a rough 3 days.

By rough I mean, tears.  Lots of tears.  Slammed doors.  Foot stomping.  Shrieks & shrills.  And surprisingly the tears aren't mine.  I always thought I would be the one crying.  And I've done some.  But they have mostly been his.  Which has been the cause of mine.

phew.  Who knew Kinder could be so hard? 

I anticipated that he would come home full of excited stories with energy to burn from being at a desk all day.  I was prepared to exhaust his physical energy.  I was not prepared for his emotional outbreaks.  And wow.  He is not holding back.

It breaks my heart for him.  I know his little mind is trying to soak up every little bit his teacher is putting out.  I know he is trying for perfection in his behavior.  I know he wants to be the smartest.  The fastest. The bestest.  And it is taking every little bit he has to give.

And while I'd like to just take it all away for him.  Let him stay home.  Go back to our summer routine of fun. fun. fun.  I can't.  And I won't.   Instead I will wake up earlier than I'd like.  I will pack that blasted lunch.  I will gel his hair to perfection.  I will sneak treats into his lunch with a napkin & a note & send him on his way.

But let it be known, I wish our mornings still looked like this:

Saturday can't get here soon enough.

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