Deep Thoughts: Choosing Happiness 2011

For those of you just joining us, my 'experiment' for 2011 has been to choose happiness.  And by choose I mean for me to make conscious choices that reflect my desire to be happy.  Which isn't to say I'm not happy now, or that I have been unhappy but more so to see how my choices work in that process.  To see where I have control of my own destiny.

I'm going back to Scoobs & the basketball situation.  Which I know is old news, but if you missed it...catch up here & here.  I'm going back to this because I learned a lot in that experience.  I have found that I learn gospel principles the best within the own framework of my family.  For instance, I learn about my relationship with my Heavenly Father by comparing it to the relationship with my own father & that of mine with my own kids.  Meaning, the parent child dynamics are the same. They way I feel about my kids, Heavenly Father feels about me, but perfectly.  I learn about my relationship with the Savior on a lot of different familial relationships, but again, most prominently with my parents & with my kids' interactions with each other on a sibling level.

So back to basketball.  I love the quote, "Trust Your Struggle."  It is a bit melancholy but so profound to me.  I have found it easiest to NOT choose happiness in the midst of my struggles.  But in reality I think our struggles makes happiness all the sweeter.  And I think I can be happy in my struggles. 

I learned a lot about my relationship with my Savior while trying to advocate for Scoobs in his basketball situation.  What was I willing to protect him from?  What did I want him to learn?  What experiences would help him learn those things?  What was too much for him?  At what point was I willing to take the fall for him? 

All questions I asked myself in regards to the basketball situation.  And if I'm being honest, a big part of my hesitation was that I did not want to make the phone call to pull him from the team.  I did not want it to be viewed as failure {to a team of people I met 1 time & would likely never see again.  Yes.  I did not want them to view us as failures.  dumb.  I know}.  But in processing this & asking myself all these questions, I learned that the Savior does the same for us.

What is He willing to protect us from?
What does He want us to learn?
What experiences will help us learn those things?
What is too much for us?
At what point is He willing to take the fall for us?

When I take the time to look at my struggles through the eyes of a loving parent helping His child to learn, it is easy to trust my struggle.  It is easy to shoulder it in happiness...even when I don't understand why.  Because as I struggle I know their is a loving Savior that is willing to shoulder the burden with me.  Just as I am willing to shoulder the burden with Scoobs.  And to be honest, I've had enough struggles to know the quicker I come to acceptance & happiness about it, the sooner I can find myself feeling like I'm on the other side {even when I'm really not!}.

And that feels like happiness to me.

Post Edit:  Did this post make you feel like I have a laundry list of struggles?  Because know, that I know how very blessed we are.  We live in abundance in every sense of the word & I don't want to pretend it is otherwise.  We have food on the table, a roof over our heads & no major health issues.